Monday, October 11, 2010

Goodbye, Chem31.

Let me start this post with a prayer. Dear God, thank you a million times over. For making my exemption from the OrgChem finals a reality. Thank you. There, amen.

Tonight has been the biggest surprise in the many recent nights that I've had. I had planned it all out earlier: Sleep, wake up in the morning, head for UP, check the results, have a haircut. But I opened my Facebook account, and behold, people were already shouting OrgChem exemption-related praises to the highest heavens. My heart, for the nth time in the past two days, jumped like mad. I entered Facebook Chat, found Jenn Gargar online as well, and asked her: May Chem na ba? (Is there Chem already?) - the results, I mean. She replied, yes. Then, she added in a split second: Exempted ka. (You're exempted.) It was enough to make me smile my widest in days, and shed a few tears - my first few in who-knows-how-long. And just like that, the five-month academic burden that was OrgChem fell off my back, shattered to pieces, and dissolved to nothingness.  

The period from Saturday evening to Monday evening (which is to say, three hours ago) was marked by spurts of imagination that resulted to my heart speeding up and my system panicking for no apparent physical reason. I would imagine what it would be like standing in front of the Department of Physical Sciences and Mathematics announcement board, seeing the exemption list. I would imagine my name being there - and me, jumping with joy. I would imagine going home to my Facebook account and cursing OrgChem for all eternity, bidding it a cold goodbye in the process. And I would imagine throwing my Chem module to the ground and crushing it with my feet, and even getting a pair of scissors to give the module a nice haircut. 

After all that, however, my mind would take a downturn. I would imagine my name not being on the list. I would imagine thinking what a fool I've been these past few days to actually think I'd somehow be exempted from the finals. I would imagine going home to a Chem module waiting to be opened again, and notes waiting for another read. And I would imagine myself waiting for Friday, and sitting another three-hour exam when Friday comes.

Then, my mind would say: Hey, no point worrying. If you're meant to take the finals, then you're going to have to take it. So chill, man. And chill I would. Until the next mental stimulus arrives, and the cycle repeats once again.

Not anymore. Because as Ellie de Castro would say it, "Being uncool has never been this fun." Or in Isabella Supnet's words, "Yes. I love being a loser." (Preface: As established last Saturday, "losers" are the ones who will be exempted from the finals.) So I say this with pride: I am one heck of a loser.

Anyway, let's call it a night. I'm, in part, thankful that all I've managed to do for the past 42 hours was finish Season 5 of Weeds in a day and watch Y Tu Mama Tambien. Of the former, I had this realization: The show is basically a look into the workings of what we 'normal people' would label 'the bad side'. In a way, the show is a question of morality itself. And of Alfonso Cuaron's pre-HP Azkaban film... well, I've never seen anything like it before. Nor have I seen so much, uh... well, let's just say it's bloody brilliant in a different way.

So for now, good night. God is great. Spread the love.

P.S. My OrgChem module is still intact. Any takers?

P.S.P. This post is so a collage of idea spurts, whatever this means. I'll talk for real - and in a more organized fashion - when Sembreak comes. Physics for now.

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