Thursday, June 7, 2012

The Monkey of Bohol

The town of Baclayon in Bohol is famous for a python sanctuary housing "Prony," one of the largest and longest snakes in captivity. Read more about that here:

But if you visit the place now, you'd know there are two bigger stars there than the humongous python - both of them, I must say, full-blown agaw-eksenas (scene stealers). The first one is the cross-dressing assistant of the woman who, I surmise, is Prony's carer (pardon the Never Let Me Go lingo). This 'carer' sits inside the enclosure with the snake (or at least, that's where she was when we went - it was molting season). But the assistant, in full-blown tropical beach dress get-up and fancy make-up, sits amongst the line of tourists waiting to enter the enclosure for their 'close encounter' with the snake. This assistant flirts with foreigners and, as I recall, said that Prony is "a virgin, never been kissed, never been touched." I think the place would be boring without her.   

The second agaw-eksena is the monkey after which this post is named.

There I was, intently gazing at the python from the opposite end of the enclosure, my face almost touching the bars.

Then, my eyeglasses took themselves off my face.

In a matter of seconds, I was the fourth big star of the place. 

People were pointing at me. Whispering. Pointing at the monkey clutching my glasses. Speaking audibly. Middle-aged white guy with bear belly bellowing, "Oh no, no, no." Mothers telling their kids what just happened. Mothers and fathers convening amongst themselves what could or would happen next. Friendly, amused, and consoling stares thrown at me from every direction.

And, as one should do in these kinds of situations, I smiled, laughed a bit. Ah, the kind of training you get from LadyMed.

The carer saw what had happened and nonchalantly threw her fan at the monkey, which then dropped my glasses to the ground. 

Fresh from the spotlight, I left the area and mingled with the free-roaming geese instead. Minutes later, a clueless girl's sunglasses were in the hands of the monkey.

P.S. Guess what my zodiac sign is.

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