So... I won both first and second prizes in this year's UP Medics' Poetry-Writing Contest, with the theme "Code Blue: Verses of Survival." Very thankful. The competition was open to all students of the UP College of Medicine and had two categories (English and Filipino) with separate sets of winners for each. There was no limit as to the number of poems one could submit, so I sent in four. As the saying goes, "winning once is great, but winning twice is greater." (I just made that up, yes.)
* * * * *
Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, in Verse
(Runner-up)
1.
1.
When
you said I was dying,
I
thought you were talking of liberation
from
lust. I thought you were talking
of
permanent escape from one-night stands,
musty
motel rooms, rubber condoms; I thought
‘dying’
was my new lease on life.
When
you said ‘dying’ as a vague certainty,
like
blank canvass and oil brushes, or blank stares
and
oiled bodies, I was thinking of thought;
I
was thinking of possibilities – those which can
be,
which
can only be – in mundane
semantics.
For
what else could you have said; what meaning
could
have hidden behind the vagrancy
of
your sentence? That I was dying
must
not have been among them.
2.
I
would like to do a million things.
Slaughter
sheep. Break some boy’s bones.
Drown
ducklings. Cripple kittens.
Shoot
an arrow straight at the nurse’s neck.
Strangle
the doctor with his stethoscope.
I
would like to do these things and a million more.
3.
When
you said I was dying,
I
thought of giving away the garden.
The
orchids on the trellis, ceramic pots,
pliant
bamboo straight from Sichuan.
I
thought of giving away the dog.
the
kitchen. the marble counters.
The
parquet floor and Roman tapestries.
When
you said I was dying,
I
was ready to hand death over
in
exchange for something smaller,
less
grandiose – say, a new lease on life.
4.
I
would like to bury myself beneath bags
of
sand. Fill my guts with gravel, grind my flesh.
I
would like to swallow the sea, and be swallowed.
I
would like to burn, to bask in the false glory
of
flames in a pyre. To play with fire, to turn
to
ashes. I would like to sleep, and wake up
one
with the embers.
5.
When
you said I was dying,
and
you said a million other things,
I
picked up my suitcase, my somber delusions,
and
a dandelion, dead, fallen on my feet;
I
strapped on my sandals, steadied my staff
to
part the swirling sea of sickness and sanity;
When
you said I was dying,
I
headed for the door, out to the garden,
and
there, on the bushes, the first blossoms
of morning – my new
lease on life.
* * * * *
A Journey by Train
(Winner)
I
would like to step on a train that will take me to places
teeming
with people from the tip of a painter’s brush.
Such
as sidewalk cafés swirling with strangers’ sweat
and
stench, and cinnamon and cheese and coffee cups.
Such
as boulevards by the bay and their emptiness
come
evening, carefully cradling a city’s craggy coastline.
Such
as galleries guarding a million murals, statues of naked men,
and
sculptures scavenged from the sundried soil of Spain.
I
would like to sit by the windows and see the countryside
fade
to a blurry smudge, like pastel colours tainted with tears.
Meadows
shall melt to muddles of green and yellow,
and
sunflowers will be specks of sawdust in the air.
Trees
will turn to wooden tinsels lined up in rows,
or
toy soldiers, browned from battle, with wreaths on their heads.
I
would like to let the tracks carry my carriage ‘cross stone bridges,
into
verdant valleys carved from the bosom of mountains.
I
would like to feel the shaking of steel beneath my rested feet,
as
if I were in some bustling town, ‘stead of rustic country.
As
if office buildings were made of stone and fertile soil,
and
restaurants sat beside streams, and disco bars beside pasture.
Come
sunset, the sky would burn a brazen, blinding orange,
and
clouds would calmly drift like shiftless sheep in the field.
Come
nightfall, the rain would gently wash grit and grime
off
the silent, tired ground – gruff like the listless labourer.
I
would like to capture more photographs in the camera
of
my mind, but then the train would slowly come to a halt.
There
in the heart of the woods, or the stone pavement of a station,
I
would get off, bringing only my limbs, some pieces of luggage,
and
the dreamy vividness of the journey. And soon wake up,
midnight, back on the
coldness of my hospital bed.
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